The Mayor and Me
So a few posting back there is a picture of me with the really old guy on the street. I call him the "Mayor of Gokulam". When we first got here he greeted me one morning with sort of an insane greeting, kind of a combination of the Tiger of Mysore roar and a satisfied belch. He has one tooth and wears crazy glasses. He is a Shaiva, and worships Shiva, that much I know. So anyway, I thought he was kind of down on his luck and I greeted him everyday and gave him a few rupees if I had change in my pocket, and he would stare at the coins and he would jabber away. He sits on the sidewalk in town near the chai stand we frequent, and so I see him quite a bit. If he was asleep, I would put rupees on his sandals, so, if the kids did not take it, he would wake up to money in his sandals. So one day this shop owner is watching me give money to the Mayor, and he asks me "Are you a very rich man?" And I was a bit taken back, and said kind of defensively "No". And the shopkeep continues by saying, "Well, he (the Mayor) is. In fact, he owns this building!" So this crazy old fox has been sitting on the sidewalk in front of his own building laughing all the way to the bank with my rupees!
He wanted a big copy of the picture of us together, so we had one printed up for him and he seems pleased. Lately he has wanted to take me somewhere. I will let you know how that goes...
Obediently yours,
FW Groundwater
The Assistant to the Mayor of Gokulam
posted by Rebecca at 3:00 AM
4 Comments:
"He is a Shaiva, and worships Shiva"
Verrry Interesting.
It is not without reason that you've met this man...
3:41 PM
Hey Guys,
Your blogs have been hilarious ..keep them going. Since most of you complain about driving in India .. I thought this FWD mail I got would cheer you up :)
"Driving in India"
For the benefit of people visiting India and daring to drive on Indian roads, I offer a few hints for survival. This is applicable to every place in India except Bihar, where life outside a vehicle is only marginally safer. Indian Road rules broadly operate within the domain of Karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company. So here
are the driving hints:
A. Do we drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is "both". Basically you start on the left side of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess(No wonder the game originated here).
B. Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed. Most drivers don't drive, but just aim their vehicles in the intended direction. Don't you get discouraged or underestimate yourself. Except for a belief in reincarnation, the other drivers are not in any better position.
C. Don't stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road. You may do so only if you enjoy being bumped in the back. Pedestrians have been strictly instructed to cross only when traffic is
moving slowly or has come to a dead stop because some minister is in town. Still, some idiot may try to wade across, but then, let us not talk ill of the dead.
D. Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries where we honk to express joy, romance or just bare lust (two brisk blasts). Here, it may be to show your resentment, frustration, or just to mobilize a dozing cow in the middle of the bazaar.
E. Keep informative books in the glove compartment. You may read them during traffic jams, while awaiting the chief minister's motorcade, or waiting for the rain waters to recede.
F. Night driving on Indian roads can be an exhilarating experience. The roads do not have shoulders, only occasional boulders.
G. Truck Drivers are the James Bonds of India and are licensed to kill.
H. Often you may encounter a single powerful beam of light about six feet above the ground. This is not a super motorbike, but a truck approaching you with a single light on; usually the left one. It could be the right one, but never get too close to investigate. You may end up proving your point posthumously.
I. During the daytime, trucks are more visible, except that the drivers will never signal. Often you will observe that the cleaner who sits next to the
driver, will project his hand and wave hysterically.
J. Occasionally you might see what looks like a UFO with blinking colored lights and weird sounds emanating from within. This is an illuminated bus, full of happy pilgrims singing bhajans. These pilgrims go at breakneck speed, seeking contact with the Almighty and often meeting with success.
K. must add a positive point also. Rash and fast driving in residential areas has been prevented by providing a "speed breaker" which is two for each
house. This mound, incidentally, covers the water and drainage pipes for that residence and is left untarred for easy identification by the corporation authorities, should they want to recover the pipe for year-end accounting.
Good Luck and God be with you!
I enjoy reading all Mysore Blogs by various people in there :) Fascinating stuff ... all small things in India makes visitors step back and smile in amazement. Hope you have a nice time in there guys !!
8:07 AM
That was hilarious!!!! :-)))
5:25 PM
bahahah.. that is a great story!
I'll be sure to sit out front in sandals when you two get back to Seattle! :)
11:32 AM
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